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  WEEK IN CRAIG: AS SPRING FINALLY APPROACHES...  
  Amy Blair    
   
 

It's a well-documented fact that as the weather gets warmer, people get dumber and dumber. Now, don't get me wrong. I like warm weather just as much as the next person. And I fucking LOVE dumb people. But it never ceases to amaze me how, year after year, as the thermometer climbs a few degrees, upper-boobies start hanging out left and right all over the place, and the whole damn city turns into a walking mob of Dawn of the Dead retardos. It messes with my mind, man.

SPRING IS A COMING!!!!

some of the things I adore with the coming of spring:

1/I ride my bike all over the city and no longer have to ride shithole subways.
2/Peel off the clothes. Tees and shorts.
3/Related to #2-woman peel off clothes and we see their lovely bodies in all there glory.
4/ Longer days. Sun.
5/ Going to the country or beach. Being outside all day.
6/ Flowers and trees bloom, making the city more attractive.
7/Outdoor concerts.
thats all I can think of for now..feel free to add.

Righto -- "woman peel off clothes and we see their lovely bodies in all there glory." Moving on.

8/Having assholes like you ride their bikes instead of annoying all the rest of us on the shithole subways.
9/You're wearing "tees and shorts." You take the guesswork out of just how much I don't want to date you.
10/Related to #9-please don't speak.
11/Longer days. Sun. Yadda, yadda.
12/Going to the country…ho hum. Zippety doo da.
13/Flowers are blooming, women are hotter…we get it, we get it…
14/Central Park Summerstage -- half-naked sweaty chicks, long lines for overpriced beer in plastic cups, and a band that you sorta liked in high school. Good shit.

SPRING you FLING? me MORE? us. WHO KNOWS? - 25

i'm bored. i'm lonely. i'm a cutie. it's getting warmer outside. it's about damn time. ready for some tall, intelligent, and sexy wit to wander through the city with me and make trouble. please send pic and descript and a catchy jingle. everybody needs a gimmick. compelling swf here, not picky 'cept for the whole tall and fascinating thing. good luck.

I just can't get over how fantastically asinine the title for this post is. I also can't get over the fact that she requests a fucking jingle to determine whether she wants to date you or not. A JINGLE. Sure, everyone needs a gimmick. But girlfriend, nobody wants to date the chick who requests that you write a laundry detergent commercial to determine whether she'll sleep with you.

Spring is here and a good time for meeting new people...........

Hi ladies, Spring is here and Summer is around the corner. "Yippy" That means less clothing and sexy sandals, meeting new friends, taking long walks, engaging in tantalizing conversations, and seeing the budding of new foliage.

I'm 5'9, very attractive, carmel in complexion, and fit. I'm interested in meeting people that are down-to-earth with a spiritual heart, witty, kind, enjoys the arts, movies and dining. Just something lite, but with a bit. Feel free to contact me as it will be nice to hear from you and a pic as well. I will send a pic of myself to. "Oh yeah," friendship is first and foremost.

LIVE, LOVE, LAUGHTHER & SUSTENACE

PLEASE!!!!!!!! I DON'T WANT TO COME OFF AS BEING SHALLOW BECAUSE WE ARE ALL BEAUTIFUL, BUT I'M NOT INTERESTED IN AGGRESSIVE LOOKING WOMEN, TRANS, BI'S OR MEN. THANKS

Live, Love, Laughther & Sustenace -- just something lite, but with a bit.

"Oh yeah," aggressive looking women are totally scary. "Yippy!"

SELECTING TWO BEAUTIFUL NON PRO ASIAN GIRLS FOR SENSUAL SPRING PARTY - m4w - 35

Four European brilliant, sexy, attractive and very friendly professionals are selecting two beautiful, sexy young asian girls for a refined evening of relaxed fun, with gourmet food, french champagne in an elegant atmosphere.

The party will be held in an high rise luxury doorman building downtown Manhattan, on Tuesday evening, starting at 9pm.

Please send us detailed description, and at least two pics (face AND body) and we'll provide all the details.

NOW we're talking. This is the shit that spring's all about. Four foreign exchange students from NYU, French champagne, and a couple of Asian hookers. Craigslist, you make me so happy.

Looking for a Sexy, Sassy, Stimulating, Smart and Seductive Woman - m4w - 35

Well, I am often told that at first impression I come across as
confident and a bit cocky, but I can also say I call my Mom twice a week and my best friend is my Sister, so perhaps a bit of a paradox as well. As Spring finally approaches there is something incredibly sexy about a toned, curvy woman in a summer dress with a great tan, or just wearing my White dress shirt and nothing else :)

For the basics, I am 35, 6'3, in great shape and have a successful career in finance. Rather than go on, I would prefer to exchange a few pictures, and rather than spend hours playing the email tango, I would hope we could meet, since both of us would know within 5 minutes of meeting, if something is there. There is a lot more than meets the eye, so if you are a Caucasian or Latin lady between ages 21 and 33 and you like what you see thus far, please respond with a photo or 2 and I will do the same

Thanks for reading this and have a great day!!!

How awesome is this sentence? "As Spring finally approaches there is something incredibly sexy about a toned, curvy woman in a summer dress." Making up sentences like this is really, really fun. Here are some that I came up with:

"As spring finally approaches I think Jon Bonjovi has remained surprisingly hot over the years."

"As spring finally approaches I bought a new pair of shoes last week, and I like them."

"As spring finally approaches I have to stop at the grocery store after work and pick up milk, eggs, and kitty litter."

Oh, craigslist. You fill me with joy. Spring rules!

 

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Amy Blair, winner of The Village Voice's "best website's summary of another website" award, is eager to be called horrible names on Craig's List. Bring it.